A Good Enough Parent: A Book on Child-Rearing was published by Alfred A. Knopf in 1987. The title borrows D.W. Winnicott’s concept of the “good enough mother” — the idea that children do not need perfect parents but parents who are reliably present, emotionally genuine, and willing to repair the inevitable ruptures that occur in any relationship.
Bettelheim’s argument is directed against the anxiety industry that surrounds modern parenting — the books, the experts, the techniques that promise optimal child development if only parents follow the right formula. He contends that this approach produces not better parents but more anxious ones, and that anxious parents communicate their anxiety to their children, creating the very problems they are trying to prevent. The alternative is not neglect but confidence: the confidence to trust one’s own instincts, to tolerate ambiguity, and to accept that children are resilient enough to survive imperfect parenting.
The book is more accessible than Bettelheim’s clinical works and more personal — he draws on his own experiences as a father and grandfather as well as his decades of clinical practice. The tone is warmer and less dogmatic than his earlier writing, though the psychoanalytic framework remains firmly in place.
Collecting A Good Enough Parent
First edition (Alfred A. Knopf, New York, 1987): Cloth binding, dust jacket.
Market values:
- First edition, fine/fine: $15–$40
- Very good/very good: $5–$15